Knowing what she knows now, everything is different. It used to be simple, quite simple actually. Practice, perform, enjoy yourself and repeat. She definitely loved skating, loved that routine and felt safe in it. Her family was proud no matter what she did and never felt the pressure that they wouldn’t be happy with what she has accomplished. Knowing now, she ties up her skates with dread of the future without her inspiration, dread of not having her watching her performance with excited eyes. With shaking hands she finishes the final knot and stands up on wobbling legs shuffling towards the ice. This practice was different, more different then she could ever imagine. What she feels is sadness, but that wasn’t the over whelming part. She is overcome with a sudden drive and determination to do this for her, not for herself, but for her. She has to prove that she is a strong young woman in the face of adversity and trauma, not for herself but for her. She had to show the world the woman that has become, because of her, in dedication to her. With a new outlook she was ready to face the world.
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